Hiding

Yesterday I had a cluster seizure.

It was frightening and resulted in my husband calling an ambulance.

These last few days have been tough. I’ve had seizures pretty much every day and I’m now so exhausted from yesterday’s episode I’m struggling to see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I want to hide.

My confidence has taken a knock – I’m not sure I want to go out or see people. In case I have a seizure. Or several.

I know I can’t withdraw from life though.

Thankfully I have a warning before a seizure which gives me just enough time to make sure the kids are safe and then get on the floor somewhere.

But I’d really rather not have them.

When I consider my situation and start to walk the ‘woe-is-me’ path I am trying to stop.

Stop and look around.

I’m surrounded by individuals who are struggling too. And it’s not even worth comparing our struggles.

The worst struggle you can go through is your own. Because that’s exactly it – it’s personal.

So, the seizures, the functional stroke, the PTSD etc…yes it is horrible and the worst thing I have to face.

But I have to face it. Hiding will not help me.

Nor will it help the countless others for whom life is a daily struggle.

We need to stand together on that path of pity. But stand tall, because we’ve come through another day.

And each day counts.